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New Year’s Resolutions

James Andrew - photo by Gabriel Everett

Let’s face it, most well intentioned New Year’s resolutions are forged and then forgotten. For whatever reason, they just don’t seem to stick.

At the risk of sounding a bit preachy, I want to quickly share my thoughts on the subject.

A big part of the problem seems to lie in our concept of time, and particularly with our expectations of the future. In fact, looking to fulfill dreams somewhere down the road often prevents us from finding them in the only moment we’ll ever have—and that, of course, is “the present.” The past is gone by definition, and the future is always beyond experience. Once we know that, then the real question becomes can we muster the courage and focus to bring our dreamiest of dreams into this very moment. Most of the time the little voices are saying no—doubt and/or fear prevail. Don’t get me wrong, caution can be a lifesaver, but if we can’t turn the negative self-speak off, then we’ve got a real problem. It colors our whole present.

In an effort to break this limiting internal dialogue, I’ve found the following two tiered approach to be particularly effective. While you may already be familiar with these ideas, it might be well worth reacquainting yourself with them. For fun, let’s just call these the WIJW Commandments:

1) Be aware of the story you’re telling yourself, and if it isn’t helping, then tell yourself a better story—this new story doesn’t have to be a masterpiece, just the tiniest positive shift in the tragic narrative you may be imagining. You can build a better and more beautiful story as things progress. Focus on POSSIBILITY instead of impossibility, and why things CAN happen, instead of why they can’t.

2) Practice gratitude. Find that spot that feels good, even if it’s only the tip of your toe, acknowledge and feel its goodness. We need to make space for good things to happen right here and now, and unproductive feelings of want and lack only perpetuate themselves. Like attracts like.

Give these a try if you care to, and be sure to let us know your thoughts along the way! Whatever your situation may be, WIJW wishes you good luck on your own amazing adventure.

Here’s to a remarkable New Year, filled with awareness, light, and blessings!

Cheers,

JA

Taking some time to reflect and contemplate, I’m sporting a Tom Ford “Country Jacket” in a dark brown wide wool check, brown silk pocket square, brown wool knit tie and “Cyrille” sunglasses, Turnbull and Asser red and white striped cotton shirt with contrast white collar and French cuffs, vintage agate cuff links, Gucci brown tweed motor cycle pant, python belt and brown leather Chelsea boots, red leather gloves by Sermoneta, Etro silk paisley scarf and my fragrance is Creed Vintage Taborome.

12 Comments

  1. Jualferx says:

    Mi único propósito es ser feliz y hacer feliz a quienes me rodean. Felices fiestas James!!! Abrazos desde Colombia.

  2. This is such a lovely post and you look great!! I am so full of gratitude at this moment as my ex-spouse is here helping me post a complex foot surgery [funny that you mention the ‘tip of your toe.’] He has been here 24/7 for almost 8 weeks. I have never felt such an abundance of gratitude and our friendship is deeper now, regardless of our divorce; after 14 years of marriage. I love your reminder of the stories we tell ourselves; it’s not preachy at all but a beautiful gesture.
    Cheers! Barbara

  3. Dean says:

    Dear James of WIJW,

    I must agree with dear Barbara, this post is so helpful and life affirming. Visualize, actualize, dream it, live it, be it, OWN IT! For example, I fell in love with a taupe paint color on a Fiat 500, but I want a Mercedes. I kept visualizing myself in a taupe car, and now am planning to buy a small Mercedes, and have it painted the EXACT SHADE OF TAUPE I desire! This color was once used on Mercedes-Benz cars, and now I will have a most distinctive mode of transport!

    Dean*****

  4. This is a wonderful post -a treasure. I have printed it out so I can refer to it when I need a reminder…you look stellar here, by, the way, and that is always a good reason, but the insight of how we direct our own narrative is invaluable. I am right now feeling that place of gratitude.
    Thank you.

  5. Annabella says:

    In this photo, I swear I can see your sweetie mounting the stairs to his beloved! Just beautifully evocative! Ralph Lauren Mad Men(and women) take note!

    Isn’t it funny, I was very nervous about writing to you about your mental and feeling manifesting practices. I pondered it for at least a year! As far as i could see, no one had queried you on that subject, although you mentioned Abraham in your “About”. I actually felt like a failure when i saw that mentioned And now, you clarified the whole subject so succinctly and with compassion, it has mushroomed, and we are all so grateful! Yet another opening in your stellar career!

    I feel a book/show/coaching combining your insightful and helpful thoughts and direction…and your wonderful style and fashion/interior design/travel photos and commentaries. Working title Perhaps…..”WIJW Commandments in Life and Style” !

    Whatever You intend to manifest, I think we all welcome these and more fulfilling nuggets of truth, blessings, light ….and style!

    Most Joyful New Years Wishes Ever, Dear James,
    Annabella

  6. Linda says:

    James, exceptional thoughts, and clear. Such a pleasure to know you, and I wish you the happiest of New Years in 2012.

  7. D. Scott Tjaden says:

    Much like an individual that responds ‘you’re welcome’ the universe responds much the same way, smiling warmly when you say ‘thank you.’ Thank ‘you’ for reminding us. Happy New Year.

  8. Jon K says:

    as everyone has commented on text ( which is great perspective ) I’d like to comment on how devilishly handsome you look is this photograph : )

    Jon

  9. So true, counting my blessings daily!
    Fab New Year dear James!
    xo*

  10. Peter Westcott says:

    James, what a wonderful reminder of how to live an extraordinary life. Your words have cut through the chaos and slothfulness of my life like a cold steel knife. As for the inner voice – I just say ‘thanks, but I’m doing well without you’. OK. I’m hitting the park now happy New Year xxx

  11. James Andrew says:

    Hello and Happiest New Year’s Wishes to ALL of you!

    I started WIJW as a guide to “Elevated Living” , I feel that encompasses more than just the stylistic side of things but a deep sense of inner peace and happiness as well.What could be more stylish than that!

    Some of the ideas I share have been quite helpful to me in living a more marvelously magical life.

    I am thrilled to hear so many of you are finding them useful as well.

    Here is to a rather spectacular 2012!

    Cheers

    JA

  12. I love this look! The color are selected perfectly!

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